How Rituals Help Us Celebrate Change Together
When was the last time you paused to acknowledge a change for you among others?
In a conversation with Seth Resler, we reflected on one of the most overlooked principles of building strong communities: rituals.
As Seth read from my book, he quoted:
“A ritual is any practice that marks a time or event as special or important. These actions are imbued with meaning. They connect the present with things in the past, and with our hope for the future.”
It is both simple and profound.
Rituals Are Everywhere and We Often Miss Their Power
When Seth asked for examples, I shared how rituals are already woven through our lives.
Birthdays, for instance, with cake, candles, song, friends, and gifts.
We all know the pattern, and that is what makes it powerful.
It is a moment that says, this day matters more than others.
Communities that last keep these shared actions that make time feel meaningful.
Whether it is welcoming new members, celebrating milestones, or grieving losses, rituals help us say, We see what is changing.
What Happens When Rituals Disappear
Many people today have stepped away from their home faith communities, often for valid reasons.
Yet when we leave those traditions, we also lose a shared rhythm for acknowledging life’s changes.
Without rituals, it is easy to feel that our growth goes unnoticed.
There is no gathering, no shared words, no memories to mark that we’ve changed.
And so, we miss what once grounded us, the communal experiences that let us see that others recognize we have matured, and they are present to see it.
A Pin, a Belt, a Gown: Why Rituals Matter
When I served in the Peace Corps, there came a moment after months of preparation when someone from the State Department pinned a small badge on my shirt.
It was quick, and that ritual marked my transformation from trainee to volunteer.
It mattered to me.
I see it is important for others all around as well.
In my son’s martial arts studio, they ensure belt ceremonies are special experiences.
Students line up, the instructor explicitly acknowledges their growth, and a new belt is tied.
Everyone in the room knows that the student has grown.
Or consider Seth’s story about his stepdaughter.
She completed an online degree program and almost skipped her graduation ceremony because originally, it felt unnecessary. She had not met her classmates in person.
She did attend. And after walking across that stage in her cap and gown, she said, “I did not think I wanted to go, but it was a big deal.”
I’m not surprised
Rituals do not need to be elaborate.
No matter how simple, it’s great when they’re shared.
Creating Rituals That Build Belonging
Rituals do not just mark change.
They bind communities together.
They remind us that our stories are interwoven.
Here is how you can bring them into your own community:
Notice what is changing.
Every transformation, new role, new skill, new season, can be acknowledged.Gather intentionally.
Even brief gatherings matter. A few acknowledging words, a symbol, a meaningful gesture can mark an important moment.Repeat what matters.
Rituals often gain meaning through consistency. When you repeat them, they can grow into anchors for belonging. Birthdays, pilgrimages, and celebrations can be revisited many times.Let them evolve.
Rituals do not have to stay ancient or formal. Let them grow with your community’s story.
The Meaning We Create Together
Rituals help us slow down in a world that rushes past transformation.
They turn moments into meaning.
And they tell each member of a community, You are seen.
As I told Seth, these shared acts can be far more powerful than we realize.
They connect us not just to each other, but to the story of who we are becoming together.
What changes in your life or your community deserve a ritual of recognition?
Who could you gather to celebrate how far you have come?
Get free resources on building the community you long for at www.charlesvogl.com
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